That Explains It
by waterrain
Summary: Russia and America were spied on by England along with France. Remember this FanFic is Humor.
1. Chapter 1

**I Do Not Own Axis Powers Hetalia. Please Review and Thank You.**

**That Explains It**

**By Waterrain**

"Capitalist pig."

"Communist bastard."

"Nyet, I'm not a bastard."

"You are for calling me fat. If you are to name an animal say a cat or a kitten. Just say any animal expect a pig."

"Capitalist bitch."

"I'm not a female dog, jackass."

"I'm not a donkey."

"See my point now, Russia?"

"Capitalist slut." Russia said innocently before kissing America on the lips and his arms were wrapped around the blue eyed Nation's hips.

France's hands were covering England's lips and he was grinning widely.

"Oh, dear. They are both sadist and masochists. Kinky. I wonder if they will go all the way." France whispered quietly into England's right ear and England's cheeks were flushed for he was regretting deciding to spy on them.

"You are a commie whore for trying to spread your communism ways." America managed to say sharply despite heavy breathing and his heart beating fast along with cheeks being flushed.

"Nyet. You are the one spreading your legs and letting anyone have capitalism." Russia said smoothly, his knee was between America's legs, and he smiled as the blue eyed Nation moaned softly. "Slut."

"Fuck you, Russia. I'm not a slut." America stated firmly, his cheeks were burning in embarrassment, and he pushed the other Nation away.

"No. I prefer to be on top." Russia commented innocently and his lips curled up into a smile.

"I will get you." America told him smoothly and his arms were crossed.

"We shall see my capitalist slut, da." Russia whispered into America's right ear and he added. "I wonder if you will prove me wrong?"

France's hand was bitten by England and he forced himself not to wince in pain. After all what would Russia and America do to them for spying?

"Bad, England." France said in a quiet voice and he rubbed his hand.

"Your hand was filthy." England muttered and he was thankful that France didn't scream.

"You are going to regret challenging me." America stated calmly and his blue eyes were narrowed.

"Nyet. It shall be fun, da. I'm curious if you will win or if I will win." Russia told him innocently and blinked his violet eyes while smiling.

"You'll be finding out pretty soon, red. Here's a little taste." America said confidently, he had Russia against the wall, and his knee between the violet eyed Nations legs. Then America kissed Russia firmly and deeply on the lips. He pulled away and saw Russia's flushed cheeks along with hearing a soft moan which made America smile brightly.

"Who is the slut now?" America asked cheerfully and he enjoyed making Russia moan.

"See you around, Commie." America stated causally as he walked towards the door and Russia caught his breath.

"Bye, Capitalist pig." Russia commented calmly as he closed and locked the door. He walked over to the slightly opened closest door, his hand turned the door knob, and violet eyes darkened in anger.

"Get out." Russia stated coldly and his arms were crossed. England and France quickly ran out of Russia's home.

"America is a tease." Russia muttered sadly and he sighed softly while shaking his head. "Why will he not give in?"

Meanwhile America was sulking as he walked and cheeks puffed out in annoyance.

"Russia is such a damn tease." America muttered quietly and his arms were crossed. "Why can't he just give up?"

France and England managed to make it to the safety of France's home.

"So those two are very sexually frustrated with each other." France commented cheerfully and he grinned. "It explains everything and they are both so stubborn."

England was still in shock, he was on autopilot, and his eyes were still wide.

"They call each other vulgar names, kiss so passionately that even a volcano pales in comparison, and yet it appears they have not had sex yet." France said calmly and he sighed while smiling.

",But they hate each other." England commented slowly and he looked at France.

"A mixture of love, hate, and lust. They feel so strongly for one another." France told him bluntly and he tilted his head while grinning. "I bet they would have some kinky sex."

"I'm going to get drunk and forget." England stated firmly and next time he is not going to spy on those two.

"Oh, I wish to be involved. However they are so intense and I already feel overwhelmed. Do you want to try joining Russia and America?" France said to the green eyed Nation and he was flipped off by England.

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**Nyet is Russian for No**

**Da is Russian for Yes**


	2. Chapter 2

**I Do Not Own Axis Powers Hetalia. Please Review and Thank You.**

**That Explains It**

**By Waterrain**

"Capitalist prostitute." Russia commented causally as he looked at the blue eyed Nation.

"You're a really low class naughty communist prostitute." America stated calmly and he smirked briefly at the violet eyed Nation. "I would be a really high class prostitute, but in the end you and I are just not prostitutes. We are Nations and neither one of us could stand the thought of selling ourselves."

"I'm not naughty. I punish naughty children." Russia said cheerfully, he received a snicker from the blond haired Nation, and blinked his violet eyes in confusion for why is America snickering at him.

"Pedo." America told him while noticing that word didn't faze the violet eyed Nation.

"You are a child compared to me." Russia informed him calmly, he smiled innocently, and tilted his head. "I'm taller than you too."

"I'm not a child." America stated firmly and his arms were crossed. "Seriously, I'm not a kid."

"You are compared to me." Russia told him causally and he suddenly grabbed the blue eyed Nation by the hips. "I do not find you to be a child or an adult. You are not completely childish in your ways, but yet you are not mature enough to be considered an adult."

"Fuck you, Russia. I'm all grown up. I'm an adult." America snapped at him and he grabbed Russia's hands. "If you are going to keep on insulting me then I'm going to do something."

"In body, da. However in mind you are not an adult. I think you grew up too fast and your mind didn't have the chance to catch up to your beautiful body. I do not mind that fact to be honest." Russia whispered softly and he moved his knee between America's legs. "Just give in, America."

"No way am I going to let you top me." America stated firmly and he grabbed the violet eyed Nation's tie pulling him down slightly. "I'm not the type to give in or give up."

"You are a stubborn capitalist…Kitten." Russia commented to him before moving away from America. "I called you kitten instead of pig."

'At least he didn't call me a pig again. If he did I would have heroically kick his ass and stuff. I'm not fat.' America thought as he looked at him. 'Russia is bigger and taller than me. Not by a whole lot, but still it's freakin annoying.'

"Kittens are weaker than pigs." Russia said innocently as he looked at the blond haired Nation.

"No, Kittens are stronger than pigs cause kittens have claws." America informed him and he heard the violet eyed Nation giggling at him for some reason, but the blue eyed Nation didn't why the reason. "What is so funny commie?"

"The kittens would be weaker than a mere pig if they are completely declawed. Not a claw to defend themselves. Bye, Capitalist Kitten. Let us meet again." Russia said cheerfully before walking away.

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	3. Chapter 3

**I Do Not Own Axis Powers Hetalia. Please Review and Thank You.**

**That Explains It**

**By Waterrain**

England wished that he didn't have to be there for the tension between America and Russia were at unbelievable levels.

"Hey, England." America said causally and he was smiling brightly at the green eyed Nation.

"Yes, America?" England asked in a bored tone.

"Do you think Russia is a slut for asking a lot of other Nations to become one with him?" America asked innocently while looking at the violet eyed Nation.

"I have no comment." England stated firmly and his arms were crossed. "I'm not going to be involved."

"Hello, England." Russia said innocently as he looked at the green eyed Nation.

"Yes, Russia." England commented calmly and he mentally sighed.

"Do you think America is a brat?" Russia asked him while looking at the blue eyed Nation.

"No comment." England replied simply and he noticed America's cheeks were puffed out.

"I'm not a brat." America stated firmly, his arms crossed, and head held up high. "I refuse to ever let you top me, Russia. Seriously, You are the one being a brat by refusing to be on bottom. It is your fault that we have not ever had sex with each other."

'Why must I be here?' England wondered silently and sighed softly. 'Why me?'

"It is not my fault, Capitalist Kitten. You are the one being stubborn, refusing to be beneath me, and take what I have to offer you. Everyone I have been with has always agreed to be under me." Russia commented to the blue eyed Nation. "It is not my fault."

"Like hell I'll ever be beneath you in any sort of way." America snapped angrily and he grabbed Russia's elbow. "No way will I be the one on bottom. You are older than me, fragile like a doll, and should always be on bottom."

"I'm older, da. I'm not fragile as you know very well, America. I have a lot more experience than you." Russia informed him gently and smiled innocently. "So let the one with more experience be on top."

"Hey, Russia. Have you ever dragged a car behind for an hour without feeling tired?" America asked cheerfully and he tilted his head. "I have more stamina. So I should obviously be the one on top cause I have a lot of stamina."

England tried to ignore America and Russia, but it was difficult and he closed his green eyes.

'I have a headache.' England thought and he sighed to himself. 'They are both bloody childish. Why can't they just take turns?'

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	4. Chapter 4

**I Do Not Own Axis Powers Hetalia. Please Review and Thank You. Remember this FanFic has the label of Drama/Humor. **

**That Explains It**

**By Waterrain**

"What is so wrong about being on bottom that you two argue?" England decided to ask them.

"You just don't get it, England. I really love disagreeing with Russia and stuff. Arguing, tossing back insults, throwing double edge compliments, feeling sexually frustrated because we can't agree on what the hell to do, and at times we go on dates when no one is looking at us. Kind of difficult since me and Russia are almost always watched." America said cheerfully and he tilted his head. "Seriously, It's pretty freakin epic and full of mystery with I have going with Russia."

"What?" England asked in disbelief as he looked at the blue eyed Nation.

"It is fun seeing America's expression and his reaction to my words. He likes seeing my expressions and my reaction to his words." Russia commented calmly and he smiled brightly. "It's not like America or I are messed up in the head."

"Unbelievable." England muttered to himself and he rubbed his forehead. "You two deserve each other."

"I'm still trying to come up with a nickname for him. Alright, He calls me Capitalist Kitten. So I could call him Communist Kangaroo or Communist K or something." America said out loud and he grinned widely.

'What the bloody hell? That doesn't make any sense.' England briefly thought and he sighed heavily to himself.

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